I NEED TO FORGET
by matt burns
It's been fourteen years
And all you see on Facebook
Never forget
Never forget
Hashtag
#neverforget
I need to forget
Everybody feels they gotta relive it
So they "never forget"
But what's the point of terrorizing ourselves?
Doesn't that make 9/11 a perpetual terror machine?
And what is NEVER FORGET
But a slogan
Probably created by a government PR firm
So we keep on never forgetting
Terrorizing oursleves
And they keep on using the event as their wild card
Justifying whatever war
Whatever intervention
Whatever surveillance
Whatever raping of our constitutional rights
Whatever "Patriot" Act
That serves their latest agenda
I respect those who died
I respect those who rescued
Including the one last remaining rescue dog (I love dogs)
I respect the hell out of all 'em
But don't make me feel guilty for not terrorizing myself anymore
That's what those in power want
To make us feel real guilty
How dare you forget, they insinuate
Keep reliving those events
Over
And over
Again
So we can take your fear
Manipulate it
And use it to get what we want
#neverforget
DEFLATE-GATE WAS AN INSIDE JOB*
by matt burns
Deflate-gate was an inside job*
Multiple Superbowl wins
Broken records
Greatest quarterback ever
Most popularity ever
Things have plateaued
Where to go from here?
Deflate-gate was an inside job*
'Til now, it's mostly been a man's sport
Women like the drama
So write them some drama
A scandal
A soap opera
Starring a dreamy hunk
Tom Brady
Deflate-gate was an inside job*
The court battles go on
And on
No resolution
'Wells' reports
Rulings
Appeals
Deflate-gate was an inside job*
And just in the nick of time
Right before the opener
Hooray
Suspension lifted
Tom Brady is exonerated
David beats Goliath
A giant victory for Patriots nation
Deflate-gate was an inside job*
The new season has a new story hook
Prove those haters wrong
Prove those deflated balls had
Nothing
To do with the wins
That's the story
That's the drama
Entertaining for the
Biggest
General
Audience
EVER
Deflate-gate was an inside job*
*I have no hard evidence to substantiate such claims but I'm going to use Wells report lingo and say "it's more than probable".
