Sunday, September 20, 2015

BLACK MASS

NOTE: I'm a huge admirer (is 'fan' a dirty word?) of Johnny Depp. I have always loved his acting roles and him as a person aside from the acting - his love of literature, friendship with Hunter Thompson etc. This poem has more to do with Hollywood than it does with Mr. Depp. It's simply a truthful account of how I felt after attending my first Hollywood movie premiere as a bystander amongst the crowd.


BLACK MASS 
by matt burns

Here I am in the middle of this crowd

Camera high above my head
My trusty third eye
Much higher than the other two
I see everything with this crazy zoom.

The crowd moves along with him

Down the steel barricades
It reminds me of a swarm of bees
Like the kind you see in a cartoon.
But I expected much worse
I envisioned a bunch of screeching boars
Sweating autograph hounds
Aggressive paparazzi.
In fact, I drank 24 ounces of Four Loco as precaution
I felt it was the only proper way to experience this
I needed desensitization
Armor.
I don't do well in crowds
Let alone movie premiere crowds
Not that I've ever been in one
I'm popping my cherry tonight.
But, no, the fans seem tamer than imagined
Everyone smells nice, too
An amalgam of perfumes and colognes, lotions, shampoos
Maybe this is the Four Loco talking
The twelve-percent alcohol volume
It's possibly changed my perception of the reality
Maybe it's not as ok as it seems.

I've been glued to the viewfinder mostly
It's been the only way I can see him
I decide to take one glance away
And holy shit!
He's there
In the flesh
Maybe ten feet away from me tops
A swarm of buzzing bees in front of me, of course
But about ten feet tops.
It's surreal
Everything 'til now has been media 
Images
Video
Film
But now he's 3-d reality.

He finishes signing the autographs 
Gives the fans a salute
Hugs his bodyguard in thanks
Hops into a black SUV
SUV speeds away
Crowd disburses
And I eventually disburse, too
Each street I walk becomes quieter
Darker
Quieter

I buy a 24oz. beer at the store on Beacon Street

Where is everyone?
I'm the only one in the place.
I find a dark bench on the BU campus, my alma mater
It's a good place to pour the beer into my thermos
It's the same thermos I had the Four Loco in.
I get most of it into the thermos
But it's frothy as hell
Shit!
Can only fit so much
I make sure nobody's close
And I drink what's left in the can.

I sip

It's dark
I'm alone
Damn, man
He seemed so cool!
I don't want to admit it
But he just seemed so cool!
Maybe I've caught the fever
The energy of adulation
Can't shake it
He just was so cool!

Seeing him tonight

Bodyguards surrounding him
Police men
Publicists
The whole entourage
It was the antithesis of this dark
Lonely 
Bench.
Going from buzzing movie premiere
To this dark emptiness
It's rattling.
I sit here
Sipping on a beer
Alone inside this empty vacuum of space
Feeling like such a nobody.

Obviously this is not true, you will say
I am a somebody
As much a somebody as him
That's cliche though
We're all full of worth, they say
You read it in every self-help book
Every motivational speaker preaches this good news
It really is true
We're all somebody
But, fuck it
Yes
No
Shake it off!
I'd be remiss if I denied the feelings
Maybe it's a disease I caught from the fans
Maybe Hollywood came into Boston like a demon
And totally fucked with my wiring!
That's what Hollywood's always done
Portrayed its stars to be gods
A true Black Mass perhaps it was
Celebrating idolatry
I was paddocked behind steel barriers with the herd
And there "He" was on the other side
He seemed so somebody
And I feel so nobody
My mind says not true
Remember those self-help books!
But my feelings
Right now
Say 
So 
True

Saturday, September 12, 2015

#DOYOURJOB


#DOYOURJOB
by matt burns

Patriots opener
The new slogan
#doyourjob
They keep on hammering it home
Do your job
Do your job

Can't help but think about Hannah Arendt
Eichmann
The banality of evil
You know,
That Nazi who was on trial after the war
They asked him how could he commit such atrocities
I was just doing my job he said

I know, I know
The Patriots meant well
What to do amidst deflate-gate?
All you can do is
Do
Your
Job
Okay, I get that
But it's just being hammered home
Way too intensely
All over the news
All over Facebook
Do your job
#doyourjob

It's not happening on a conscious level
More in the shadowy subconscious
But the more I hear the slogan
The more 
And more 
I feel I'm being re-programmed 
Brainwashed
With a philosophy of amorality

Friday, September 11, 2015

I NEED TO FORGET


I NEED TO FORGET
by matt burns

It's been fourteen years
And all you see on Facebook
Never forget
Never forget
Hashtag
#neverforget

I need to forget
Everybody feels they gotta relive it
So they "never forget"
But what's the point of terrorizing ourselves?
Doesn't that make 9/11 a perpetual terror machine?

And what is NEVER FORGET
But a slogan
Probably created by a government PR firm
So we keep on never forgetting
Terrorizing oursleves
And they keep on using the event as their wild card
Justifying whatever war
Whatever intervention
Whatever surveillance
Whatever raping of our constitutional rights
Whatever "Patriot" Act
That serves their latest agenda

I respect those who died
I respect those who rescued
Including the one last remaining rescue dog (I love dogs)
I respect the hell out of all 'em
But don't make me feel guilty for not terrorizing myself anymore
That's what those in power want
To make us feel real guilty
How dare you forget, they insinuate
Keep reliving those events
Over
And over
Again
So we can take your fear
Manipulate it
And use it to get what we want
#neverforget

Saturday, September 5, 2015

DEFLATE-GATE WAS AN INSIDE JOB*


DEFLATE-GATE WAS AN INSIDE JOB*
by matt burns

Deflate-gate was an inside job*

Multiple Superbowl wins
Broken records
Greatest quarterback ever
Most popularity ever
Things have plateaued
Where to go from here?

Deflate-gate was an inside job*

'Til now, it's mostly been a man's sport
Women like the drama
So write them some drama
A scandal
A soap opera
Starring a dreamy hunk
Tom Brady

Deflate-gate was an inside job*

The court battles go on
And on
No resolution
'Wells' reports
Rulings
Appeals

Deflate-gate was an inside job*

And just in the nick of time
Right before the opener
Hooray
Suspension lifted
Tom Brady is exonerated
David beats Goliath
A giant victory for Patriots nation

Deflate-gate was an inside job*

The new season has a new story hook
Prove those haters wrong
Prove those deflated balls had
Nothing
To do with the wins
That's the story
That's the drama
Entertaining for the
Biggest
General
Audience 
EVER

Deflate-gate was an inside job*

*I have no hard evidence to substantiate such claims but I'm going to use Wells report lingo and say "it's more than probable".

Friday, September 4, 2015

TRYING TO TAKE IT ALL IN


TRYING TO TAKE IT ALL IN
by matt burns

Last little stroll before I have to leave
Back and forth
Back and forth along the shore
Trying to take it all in
Can't leave 'til I'm satisfied
I stop 
And stare into the horizon
Pry my eyes wider with my fingers
Trying to suck
Or soak it all in
Just a little more
Little more
The waves crash on the shore
And crash
It's time to go now
I turn and walk away
But I turn around again
One more look at the ocean
I'm still not satisfied
Still feel there's more to take in
The other vacationers seem so content
I'm here
In this beautiful place
And I can't get content
What I take in 
Is 
Never 
Enough

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

THERE'S ALWAYS THE OCEAN




THERE'S ALWAYS THE OCEAN
by matt burns

Hypnotic colors and whirlpool-like funnels
The MTV announcer dude's voice is slowed down and hypnotic
Miley keeps sticking her tongue out like a serpent
Nicki has this big headdress on her
She looks like some sort of goddess
There's men on their knees below her
Goddess worship, like in Babylon
Another guy's riding in some chariot like a pharaoh
Then, a singer named "the weeknd" is dancing around in flames
Kanye's blabbering on about art
What is art, Kanye?
What I'm seeing on this TV right now?
He ends by saying he smoked weed before the show
Ice Cube's son looks high, too
Cube's hands are locked, thumbs forming a pyramid
Illuminati symbolism all over the place
All-seeing eyes et al.
Then Miley's performance is the finale
Everyone onstage looks like demonic creatures
There's this large disturbing mouth on a screen behind her
The mouth has mud and blood and cum oozing out of it
Everybody's playing with their crotches
Dancers in thongs turn around and spread their ass cheeks
Post-show, Miley smokes a joint on camera
Hands it over to a photographer who smokes the rest
What the fuck am I watching?

Lucky for me, I'm about a hundred yards from the beach

At least I can walk right into the ocean
Submerge myself in salt water, smother myself with seaweed
Cleanse myself from what I just watched on the TV
This ocean's the purest thing left in this world
So charged with good energy
The lungs of God, right here
Breathing good energy into this world
Replacing what the VMA's just sucked out of it

When the world gets all devil on you

And makes you think God is dead
There's always the ocean
It may be far away for some
Closer for others
But it's out there
There's always the ocean

DOG YEARS


DOG YEARS
by matt burns

No wonder why dogs don't live as long as us

You bring them on vacation
In a strange cottage you rented for a week
And they have no idea what's going on
You try to explain
But they don't understand
Their world's collapsing all week
And the stress eats away at their life force

These dogs are are so haunted by fears

Most of the time they have no idea what's going on
Forget going on vacation, just put them in a car
They have no idea where they're going
The park?
Vet?
New home?
So much anxiety
The stress accelerates their aging
And this is why they live 10-15 years tops
That's why, in case you're wondering, you guys

THE INMATES EXPLAIN GASSING


THE INMATES EXPLAIN GASSING
by matt burns

I haven't been feeling well
And I've been vedging on the couch
Watching a lot of Lock-up
The inmates are proud of their gassing
Gassing consists of mixing urine and feces
Let it fester in a bag for a while
Add shards of glass from a crushed light bulb
Then throw contents at prison guard
Guard instinctively wipes it off or smears it
The shards dig into the flesh
The piss and urine gets into the blood
Infectious disease may result

The inmates go on with their explaining

And they're so proud of being good at the gassing
As I listen, I feel like less of a disgrace to society
I try and try to contribute in a constructive way
I don't make much money
And I do utilize some social programs
The economy doesn't benefit much from me
I feel that sometimes I take more than I give
Some days all I do is write poems
Or not even that
Sometimes, I just write in my journal
It isn't much, I know
But at least I'm not locked in prison
Eating away at taxpayer dollars
While all I contribute
Is piss
Shit
Festered
And mixed together with shards of glass

I'm glad there's these prison shows

So I feel worthier of existence