GETTING KICKS ON ROUTE 66 AND KILLING TIME

DRIFTING ON ROUTE 66

by matt burns

I’ve spent my life on Route 66

My family rode up and down it every summer

And then I grew up and wrote my first book about it

And then I wrote three more books

Then I hosted a TV documentary about it

And, after that, a five-disc DVD box set

I lived and breathed Route 66

Route 66…

It’s always been a road about getting somewhere

And I think that’s why I’ve always been drawn to it

I’ve always wanted to get somewhere

Better than here

But I’m not sure I’ve ever gotten there

Every time I go from Chicago to LA

I think I’m going to find it

But then I don’t so I try again

And again

I’ve been drifting up and down 66 my whole life

Chasing some evasive carrot

Like Arthur’s quest for the Holy Grail

But I still haven’t gotten the carrot

And I’m not sure I ever will

And I’m not sure I even know what it is

It’s just something to chase

Something to keep me going

And giving me an excuse to live

Even when I die

My ghost will probably still wander 66

Looking for that abstraction

The carrot

And I won’t be alone

There will be other ghosts

Just as there are right now

The ghosts of millions of Americans

KILLING TIME

by matt burns

I had a dream last night that I got a new job

I was sitting at a desk next to my boss

And we were doing something with computers

And there wasn’t really enough to do

So I remember doing needless things

Like cleaning every speck of dust off my desk

And between the computer keys

Taking needless bathroom trips

Filling up my cup at the water bubbler

So I’d have to pee more

And then kill more time going to the bathroom

I’m not sure why I had the dream

But I think it was born out of a trauma

And when I say trauma I don’t mean anything too bad

But I mean a negative feeling

A fear

Because I’ve had one too many jobs

Where I have had to kill time

And for a lot of people this is fine

They’re getting paid to kill time, no work is a good thing

But for me it’s a big fear

Killing time is killing minutes of my life

My precious life force

And my potential human energy

And potential human productivity

Because I know if I was out of the office, on my own

I wouldn’t be forced to kill the time

For the sake of riding out my shift

And collecting my paycheck

I’d be making use of my time

Even if it’s playing video games

Hiking in the forest

Staring into space in the shower thinking

At least there’s no killing involved

My biggest fear

Is having to kill time

Because killing time

Is killing my human spirit

Is killing my life

Is killing my soul